We all strive towards healthy relationships, especially in our most intimate settings, yet it is in close environments where so many people are struggling to maintain happiness.
The yearning is there for so many to be able to come home after a day’s work and let out the day’s frustrations, to be met by a loving, kind, compassionate partner who listens and loves unconditionally, who puts us back in a state of balance, who reminds us what is important and all go to bed happily and peacefully.
The reality, however, is quite the opposite. We go home, listen to everyone else’s dramas and when finally we let ours out, the only thing that get’s reflected back is the self-blame and frustration we’ve already been dealing with the whole day. It’s not uncommon to turn to our children for a little tender loving comfort, and while they may set us at ease with some surprisingly insightful upliftment, at our core we know that we are unfairly furthering the cycle of dependency through them.
The truth is that all our needs and desires of today has been programmed into us from a very young age, or sometimes even from previous lifetimes. Our bodies are containers of memory and can help us access memories where limiting beliefs about ourselves where formed.
At it’s core, most of us may reach awareness of limiting beliefs that we are not good enough, that we don’t fit in, or that we have to protect ourselves, yet even though these beliefs are about ourselves, they are so intelligently hidden and masked that they are often unrecognizable. We tend to see the imperfections in our relationship parters so much easier. Or one mask deeper, we don’t even see the behavior of our partners, we simply feel discontent, disappointed and frustrated within ourselves, not knowing what to do with it or where it comes from. We may also attract partners who continually enforce the negative beliefs about ourselves.
The good news is that we CAN restore the goodness we deeply long for and believe in. There is a reason we yearn for it. Because we, as humanity, are on a path of healing and evolution, we all have the intuition of wholeness, a sense of belonging and unbounded love. It is our own suffering that pushes us to our limits of needing to connect to wholeness to make it through.
The way to access healing, is by picking up the little pieces of this wholeness that was lost along the way of growing up. Little landmarks were left for us, by us, like in the story of Hansel and Gretel,where we leave the trail, but it gets lost and only after much struggle do we find a way home again. We have to use our intuition to go back and connect the parts of ourselves in order to come home. Coming home to oneself is the start of the journey of wholeness. It is this relationship we unknowingly crave for in our partners. It is the tender care and acknowledgement and understanding that we all deserve and the way to access it is through the inner child.
Inner child Journey work is the most effective way to a wholesome relationship with yourself. It is through this relationship, that all other relationships flourish.
Classical indications that you ay benefit from inner child work include:
- Unexplained anger outbursts.
- Wanting to control the behavior of those closest to them.
- Fear of abandonment and rejection.
- Feeling that people do not like them.
- Problems with intimacy.
- Feeling unworthy, not good enough.
- Fear or hostility towards authority.
- Not comfortable with challenges.
- Intimidated by sex, or their love partners.
- The need to be perfect of always right.
- Addictions of all kinds.
- Afraid to express their needs.
- Uncomfortable with love and affection.
- Hidden shame of self.
- Choose partners that are emotionally absent or abusive.
- Not able to ne authentic about true feelings.
- Guild over not living up to expectations of others or self.